SH3 Hash Trash

 

Vol. 1, No. 1

Hash Date:     30 October 2003

Written by:    Nuclear Seaman

 

 

            In the first ever (well…… everything is a “first”) SH3 Halloween Hash, a record ten hashers showed – both in and out of costume (some obviously didn’t read the e-mails closely).  Four virgins – Virgin Jeff, Virgin Richard, and Virgins Efraim (aka George of the Jungle) & Julie (aka Scott Baio, martial artist) (a couple) – “came” at the invitation of regular hashers.  Regular hashers included Religious Advisor Papa Don’t Preach (aka Just Christian), Hashmeister Nuclear Seaman (aka Satan), Virtual Clinton (aka white tiger), Laura Jean BJ Queen (aka “what was that costume? Drag queen?”), Just Christian (aka black-eyed peas), and Just Matt (aka hare).

            After a few brews at the Socorro Springs Brewery to wet the palate, the hares – Nuclear Seaman and Just Matt – headed out with a 15 minute lead into the eerie darkness to lay trail (need a full moon hash sometime).  Using a mix of flour and “glowstick” liquid (I’m not sure I’d recommend this in the future as the stuff stinks), the hares took the pack on a tour of the suburbs and ditch banks of Socorro toward the university campus.  Shiggy was minimal as there are only a few water holes in this realm where one can safely make the pack suffer (unless, of course, a recent rain has provided other opportunities).  Checks were generally laid in well-lit spots (i.e., the middle of the street) much to the dismay of Papa (you know you didn’t have to stand in the middle of the street).  Through the campus and back toward the brewpub, the pack lost trail near Nuclear Seaman’s house, missing out on a carefully planned graveyard scene (courtesy of Nuclear Seaman’s wife).  Only Virtual Clinton got to enjoy the full effect of running through the cobwebs.  After regaining trail, the pack proceeded to BN a block over from Nuclear Seaman’s thanks to our gracious hosts Mike & Debra Dennis.  Only the hares know how much lead they really had – and they’re not talking.  After a few more brews and goodies (great cookies!!!!), the entire group headed back to the brewpub for religion and the naming of Just Christian and Just Matt.

            Religious activities took a more “formal” turn, led by SH3’s Religious Advisor, Papa Don’t Preach.  Papa invited the virgins up to down-down and betray those who made them “come.”  Thus, Papa, Just Matt, and Just Christian also had to imbibe.  Just Christian has yet to learn the traditions and avoid multiple down-downs for violating hash etiquette by wearing a hat during a down-down.  Papa, on the other hand, seems to relish any opportunity to down-down (go figure).  The hares were the next subject of ridicule, as trail was duly analyzed by the pack.  All the usual whining took place (yes, whining).  The only valid complaint was the lack of shiggy.  And a down-down by the hares.  Just Christian (poor boy never learns) received a down-down for saying he liked the trail!  By this point, Papa was getting cold (and it showed!!!!) and he had to borrow LJBJQ’s jacket.  Finally, the pack came to the naming of Just Christian and Just Matt.  After some heated discussion (maybe the harrierettes were in heat), Just Christian became Father Snowball (I won’t even begin to explain that one for fear I could get charged with violating internet pornography laws) and Just Matt became Seven Inches Shy (based on some help from Just Matt’s spouse).  Father Snowball is a great match for LJBJQ (since they usually “come” together….. or maybe not).  Seven Inches Shy speaks to many aspects of Just Matt’s background (and dark secrets).  No whining guys – the pack has spoken!

Time ran out (yes, the brewpub was closing) as plans were made for the next hash (at night no less) on Thursday, 20 November, 6 PM at the brewpub, hares TBD (although a rumor is floating around that the two “old guys” will co-hare).  This old guy, though, will be in Massachusetts that night.  Any thoughts on a theme – like “come” as your favorite “turkey?”

And that’s the way it was, 30 October 2003!